Nicola Walker Coaching

Transform Your Mindset: Reignite Joy, Live Your Dream

fears

Say Goodbye to Self Doubt and Trust Yourself

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Orange poppy in full bloomHappy New Year!!! May this be your best year ever! We all have the potential to experience our best year ever. The beginning of each new year offers us a tiny window of opportunity to believe this time it could be different – before the doubts set in.

Self doubt is a big reason why some of us don’t make the changes that we really want to make, or get disappointed because our dreams don’t come true – yet again. It’s especially easy to waver on your commitment when there is a big contrast between what you really want and the way your life is now. You start to question your abilities, or even question what you really want and the direction you need to take.

A flood of reasons why having what you really want would be hard, or even impossible fills your mind, conveniently keeping you safe in your not so comfortable comfort zone.

What if you did really trust yourself? What would trusting yourself look or feel like? When you trust yourself, you are able to make decisions, trust your decisions and choices, then act on them.

The habit of self doubt can make it hard to really value, or even know your gifts. You feel like “something” is blocking you from really putting yourself out there and making a successful career with your innate gifts, passions and talents. [Read more…] about Say Goodbye to Self Doubt and Trust Yourself

Thank Yourself for Being You

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Tip of the IcebergIt takes time to know who you truly are, especially if you want to lift the veils of superficial perception to peer below into the depths of your soul. Such a concept is daunting for some, and not such an obvious thing to do for many, as it’s easy to get swept up by the overall impression we have built up of ourselves over the years. Yet our own impressions of ourselves are often flawed by self-judgment and distorted memories.

Fortunately for myself, life saw me as a coconut that needed cracking open. I was chugging along, when all of a sudden the rug was pulled out from under me catapulting me into an intense transition that lasted several years. Forced to face my fears around my survival and the beliefs I held that were holding me back from blossoming, I found relief by dropping into the well of joy within myself that existed despite all my judgments and self-inflicted suffering.

There is a succulence deep within you that feeds you, like the store of water a cactus holds for the dry days.  [Read more…] about Thank Yourself for Being You

Fast Track to Happiness – Engage Your Inner Wisdom Daily

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When fear is operating in you whether you realize it or not, it’s hard for your inner wisdom to communicate with you. That’s partly because the last place you look when you’re gripped with fear is to your inner wisdom.

Fear sabotages your dreams, your passion and your creativity. Procrastination, perfectionism, self-doubt, overwhelm and low self-worth are all forms of self-sabotage. You know those times when you go rigid inside or start hitting those hugely frustrating inner walls. There you are again, despite your best intentions.

I’ve met all these forms of self-sabotage intimately within my own self, especially in developing my business and with my creative projects. The greatest breakthrough I made was when I learned how to keep going deeper inside to connect with my inner wisdom for help.

We all have inner wisdom, the part of us that knows what to do, the steps to take to reach the destiny that’s deep down in our heart.

It actually is an enlightening and load-off-your-shoulders practice to turn to your inner wisdom for guidance throughout your day.

For example, if you find yourself facing a wall, your inner wisdom will show you the way through it.

When you face your own inner walls, the blocks you typically face that make you grit your teeth and growl, sending any chance of inner happiness hurtling to the other side of the planet, you’ll notice your mind wants to keep you spiraling to greater depths of hopelessness and despair.

It’s a great discipline to be able to say STOP!!!

Once you’ve achieved the stopping, you are all set for the relief you’ll get from some guidance from your inner wisdom.

The best place to look for your inner wisdom is in your heart. You can converse with your inner wisdom like you would a person.

All you have to do is listen for the whispers, trust and follow the guidance. But once you decide to trust you inner wisdom’s guidance, you have to take the leap!

Nicola Walker is an Inner Wisdom Coach and Self Expression Mentor. She works with creatively-minded people in big transitions to transform fears, low confidence and procrastination so they can go for their dreams. She coaches them to find their truth; to turn to their inner wisdom for help so they can live their passion and be happier in their lives.


 

Where Does Fear Hold You Back?

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cobwebDo you have days when your mind becomes dull with brain fog and a mysterious paralysis strangles your ability to take action? Fear has crept up, weaving its insidious tentacles around you like sticky cobwebs. Once you become fear’s prisoner, then fear will feed you stories, none of them true, about why you can’t have what you want.

How do I know this? Because I’ve been there. Fear can still lie in wait for me when I get out of bed in the morning. I have to be alert so it doesn’t trip me up and make me captive. Even when I’m really on a roll, in the flow, without a care in the world, I can still, all of a sudden, without any warning, get caught in fear’s trap.

It’s interesting to note that the more I devote time to doing what I love, the more prone I am to fear because I am taking risks, putting myself out there, unsure of how people will respond to me, facing the unknown financially. Yet, I am also feeling strong and vibrant because I love what I do, which helps to keep fear at bay. The worst kind of fear is the paralyzing kind, that makes you avoid doing what you long to do. The kind of fear that makes you see closed doors, no options, vicious circles and danger signs everywhere you look.

There are a couple of situations that I have known intimately, that force you to face your fears. Going through life transitions is one of them. Going through divorce, death of a loved one, leaving a job, starting a business or new job, beginning a new relationship, ending a relationship, children leaving home, health issues or moving. Suddenly, you are not floating along or treading water. You are facing a brand new situation. Change is always an opportunity for growth. You either feel energized and creative. Or, you feel flattened with fear, prone to self doubt. Or maybe you flit between the two.

The other situation is finding your unique self expression. You know when you have a vocation or a form of creative expression inside you that you are trying to ignore or suppress. Again, the risks are great. What if you mess it up, make mistakes? How will people respond to you? Will you make money, lose money or forget about the money? Is it easier to just forget about it? The answer is always no. You’ll never be able to effectively forget about it anyway. Also, a part of you starts to wither and die, just like a plant that has been placed too much in the shade.

The longer you ignore any situation that makes you uncomfortable, the worse it gets. This goes for a business that is stagnating from a lack of unique self expression, or a relationship that’s undernourished, deprived of love, passion and creativity. Fear acts like a snowstorm falling on a rose. It freezes beauty, inspiration and growth.

So you have to face the fears that hold you back, shine a light on them, expose them for what they are. Fear doesn’t like the light. It thrives in the dark. So find the light of truth inside you. Your inner wisdom is stronger than your fear, and will lead you where you need to go for your greatest happiness and fulfillment.

 

What Happens When You Block Your Feelings

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Sometimes people have told me that they block their feelings and emotions. I can understand the temptation at times, when you don’t want to rock the boat. Emotions can be messy, with no respect for perfect timing. You don’t want to blubber during a meeting with a prospective client who says, “No,” and your mortgage is due. Or, shout at your boss when you need your job. Or even listen to those feelings that something doesn’t feel right about your relationship when you’re just about to fly off on vacation.

So it’s natural to want to push down inconvenient feelings and emotions back where they came from. At least you can control pretending things are fine.

This might work for a while. But it’s a little like pushing down a ball in water. The greater the force you use to push it down, the greater the splash when it finally surfaces. And if the ball is there, it will emerge at some point.

Have you ever had a bunch of roses that didn’t all bloom? Sometimes you get one bud that just holds its petals tight, hiding its beauty from your eyes.

Feelings and emotions make you bloom and grow. They lead you into a vulnerable place where the light can shine through. You face the unknown, but it’s real. It’s exciting actually. If you like watching adventures on TV or the movies, you might enjoy your own. “Oh my God, what’s going to happen next?!”

I do believe that living your full bloom takes a lot of courage, but that’s what life is about. I’ve been totally committed to mine, even though this has meant facing fears on a more regular basis than some people might. Courage is a muscle you develop, just like learning to listen, trust and follow your inner guidance is a muscle. Discipline, persistence and choosing to find your way back to inner happiness are all muscles too.

One of the ways your inner wisdom speaks to you is through your feelings and sensations. If you block your feelings then you block your inner wisdom, which is like your life force. Your inner wisdom helps you to elevate your life beyond the mundane. It leads you to discover more about yourself, your heart and life itself by stepping through pain, facing the unknown and discovering the light.