Nicola Walker Coaching

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Not Feeling Joy in Life: Find Your Truth and Live The Full You

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Sunlit Path in Redwoods - when not feeling joy in life, find your truthHave you noticed that you are not feeling joy in life? If you yearn for a sense of completeness and a richer, fuller life, choose to honor your truth. Discover how to find your real truth, the truth that makes you feel alive, rather than the false truth that flattens you.

Many years ago, unhappy in my marriage and not feeling joy in life, I attended a personal growth workshop where I burst into tears, sobbing that I was “living half a life.” My words seem to land in every woman’s heart that day. One of them approached me later to say that she realized that she too was living half a life. She promptly announced that she was leaving her job and moving. She drove off to live in another city. I faced the truth of how I really felt about my marriage and ended it. This was the right choice for me at the time, and in retrospect.

Since then, I have had billions of opportunities to face my truth. Each day, I have to find what is true for me. Sometimes my truth is obvious; my truth moves me into action that feels good and right. Other times I can wrestle with my truth, trying to convince myself that it’s really something else. I don’t know quite why I’m sometimes unwilling to face my truth, because I suffer the consequences. I feel small, incapable, confused, anxious, tired and don’t enjoy life. However, when I find, face and follow my truth, I feel alive, vibrant and joyful. I am courageous and free inside, which results in me feeling enriched by who I am and by the richness of life.

If you are not feeling joy in life, take some time to reflect on what is going on in your heart.

Most importantly, find and honor your truth. Follow the career that calls you deep in your heart, make your business joyful, or launch yourself into the special project that makes your heart sing. Life is too short to settle for second best.

Here are three steps you can take to find your truth: [Read more…] about Not Feeling Joy in Life: Find Your Truth and Live The Full You

Making Peace with Now, Even When What You REALLY Want is Different

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Stepping stones across stream“You don’t have to have an ideal life, which appears to be the pinnacle of perfection. You are also not a failure if you don’t yet have the life you really want. You just want to be creating the life you really want.”

If you are focusing on what you really want, it stands to reason that you don’t have it now. So why pin yourself to the wall with an imaginary knife, twisting it round saying, “How could you have landed up in a marriage where you still feel lonely?”, “How could you have taken so long to be doing work that’s deeply fulfilling?”, “How could you be once again starting over, trying to find your way?” or “How could you still not be doing what you really want to be doing?”

Here are 3 enriching practices to make peace with your current reality, while creating what you really want: [Read more…] about Making Peace with Now, Even When What You REALLY Want is Different

What Happens When You Block Your Feelings

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Sometimes people have told me that they block their feelings and emotions. I can understand the temptation at times, when you don’t want to rock the boat. Emotions can be messy, with no respect for perfect timing. You don’t want to blubber during a meeting with a prospective client who says, “No,” and your mortgage is due. Or, shout at your boss when you need your job. Or even listen to those feelings that something doesn’t feel right about your relationship when you’re just about to fly off on vacation.

So it’s natural to want to push down inconvenient feelings and emotions back where they came from. At least you can control pretending things are fine.

This might work for a while. But it’s a little like pushing down a ball in water. The greater the force you use to push it down, the greater the splash when it finally surfaces. And if the ball is there, it will emerge at some point.

Have you ever had a bunch of roses that didn’t all bloom? Sometimes you get one bud that just holds its petals tight, hiding its beauty from your eyes.

Feelings and emotions make you bloom and grow. They lead you into a vulnerable place where the light can shine through. You face the unknown, but it’s real. It’s exciting actually. If you like watching adventures on TV or the movies, you might enjoy your own. “Oh my God, what’s going to happen next?!”

I do believe that living your full bloom takes a lot of courage, but that’s what life is about. I’ve been totally committed to mine, even though this has meant facing fears on a more regular basis than some people might. Courage is a muscle you develop, just like learning to listen, trust and follow your inner guidance is a muscle. Discipline, persistence and choosing to find your way back to inner happiness are all muscles too.

One of the ways your inner wisdom speaks to you is through your feelings and sensations. If you block your feelings then you block your inner wisdom, which is like your life force. Your inner wisdom helps you to elevate your life beyond the mundane. It leads you to discover more about yourself, your heart and life itself by stepping through pain, facing the unknown and discovering the light.

Follow Your Heart

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When a new year begins, it’s as though your slate has been wiped clean and you can begin again. Ask yourself, “what is deepest in my heart to create and experience?” Keep this question with you as you go about your day, especially when you go for walks, exercise or relax. The answer will float into your consciousness.

Ideas about what you want in life can change. That’s why it’s important to listen to what is true, to find out if it is still true for you. Remember that life can be perceived in many different ways. Keep going deeper to find the truth. You’ll know when you find your deepest truth, because you’ll resonate with it. Maybe you feel a rush of energy, a quickening or a deep sense of inner knowing.

It’s always most effective to act on what feels most alive for you. When you listen deeply in this way, you are flowing with your inner wisdom that is guiding you to your highest good. Maybe you hear that it is time to address an issue that has been bothering you with another person. Or it is time to stay at home and spend more time alone. Or now is the moment to look into that niggly feeling that you could be doing more with your life.

If you ever feel dull, irritable or dissatisfied, ask yourself, “what is true for me?” “Am I following my truth?” You’ll find your truth in your heart. Summon up the courage to follow your heart and you’ll feel full of life again. This is the path of inner happiness.