“You don’t have to have an ideal life, which appears to be the pinnacle of perfection. You are also not a failure if you don’t yet have the life you really want. You just want to be creating the life you really want.”
If you are focusing on what you really want, it stands to reason that you don’t have it now. So why pin yourself to the wall with an imaginary knife, twisting it round saying, “How could you have landed up in a marriage where you still feel lonely?”, “How could you have taken so long to be doing work that’s deeply fulfilling?”, “How could you be once again starting over, trying to find your way?” or “How could you still not be doing what you really want to be doing?”
Here are 3 enriching practices to make peace with your current reality, while creating what you really want:
- Be here now. It’s marvelous and important to get clear about what you really want. The only caveat is that you can stay stuck in a future place, feet dangling above the present moment with your emotions tantalizingly tied up in a fraught state of longing while you gaze down in dismay at your current reality. Focus on what’s special about where you are now, while you move forward towards what you really want, one step at a time.
- Embrace what you really want. Embracing is a much softer, more loving energy than trying to grasp your desired goal, while making your life miserable. When you embrace what you really want, your desired outcome is present in your heart and in your arms already. Let yourself be filled with gratitude for what is yours.
- Be gentle on yourself. You are taking a stand for what you really want and stepping out towards it. You are extremely courageous and deserve to be treated like a queen rather than a beggar. Don’t push or punish yourself. Give yourself plenty of breaks. Amp up the self-care and know how to take care of yourself emotionally.
You want to become an energetic match to what you really want. Become so empowered and joyful that you are irresistible to your new life.
I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments on this post. You can comment here on my blog or sending me an email – Nicola[at]nicolawalkercoaching.com.
Nicola Walker is a life coach for women in mid-life and author of the forthcoming book, Finding Joy in the Middle of the Mess. She guides her clients to reconnect with a deep sense of joy as they create the life they REALLY want. She trained as a hypnotherapist in 1995, then as a life coach in 2001. Nicola lives in Santa Cruz, San Francisco Bay Area, California.
Want to explore further? Nicola offers a free How to Have What You Really Want Discovery Session by phone or Skype. https://nicolawalkercoaching.com/discovery-session