“Finding and following your inner calling is different for everyone, so that’s why comparing yourself to others is just being cruel to yourself and so not the point.”
“I actually felt shame about having taken so long,” a client admitted the other day. “I’ve been sitting on the fence, but I couldn’t get clear enough to move forward with what’s been calling me.”
My heart was wide open feeling the pain of her shame. I immediately guided her to be gentle with herself, to help her see that the unfolding of her passionate purpose has been perfect, that there is always a larger picture where so many things you wouldn’t even think of need to happen before you can be ready to take those first steps.
“It’s different for everyone,” I said, “so that’s why comparing yourself to others is just being cruel to yourself and so not the point.”
The call of your heart speaks in whispers, nudges and yearnings. It evolves and takes shape with its own timing as you take the steps to meet it. Listen to your heart – it is showing you the way to live your purpose. You could feel drawn to write, to paint, to speak in front of groups, to travel, to interview people, to be part of the solution to a social or environmental issue, to invent something that you keep imagining and long to make real.
Whatever pulls you and speaks to you is an ingredient of your vision. It will either be part of the life that is perfect for your soul or will help you to get closer to following your inner calling.
The greatest advance you can make is to love yourself for being exactly where you are. Notice how it feels to love yourself for being exactly where you are. You have to feel the softening, the sigh of relief that comes from your body, your tender, loving heart and the peace that comes from letting go of striving and judging.
Finding this love and acceptance within yourself is actually so delicious you want to bask in it for at least a short while. It’s like eating a gourmet desert. You want to savor it, still feel it swimming around your taste buds long after you’ve actually swallowed it.
Once you’ve bathed yourself in love and acceptance, you actually have the energy, strength and wisdom to know what action you need to take next. Your intuitive antennae are alert, you are in touch with your inner knowing, which will gently prompt you forward.
I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments on this post. You can comment here on my blog or sending me an email – Nicola[at]nicolawalkercoaching.com.
Nicola Walker is life coach for women in mid-life and author of the forthcoming book, Finding Joy in the Middle of the Mess. She works with women who’ve been through big life changes and after years of putting their “just for the money” career, family or other significant relationships before themselves, know that there’s something more for them to do with their life- starting now! Nicola guides her clients to find their inner calling and boldly believe in themselves to create the life they desire.
Following her own call to step up into her true self, while life was being turned upside down with loss, made her face her fears and learn to believe in herself. Nicola discovered first hand the benefits and profound relief of committing to joy and her inner calling no matter how messy life gets. She now emphasizes a “find joy first” approach to choosing a second career, following a creative path or designing a meaningful life that is perfect for your soul.
Nicola offers a free Find Your Inner Calling Discovery Session.
Dear Nicola, I have just finished reading a few parts of your website, and the article above, I want to thank you for giving wonderful clarity to the basics, whuch I believe are so needed in this world, and only heart teachers seem able & desirous to do this for others. Each sentence in this article was important and I have experienced these awarenesses. But today I especially needed the
” The greatest advance you can make is to love yourself for being exactly where you are. Notice how it feels to love yourself for being exactly where you are. You have to feel the softening, the sigh of relief that comes from your body, your tender, loving heart and the peace that comes from letting go of striving and judging.”
I know exactly what you mean–and yet it is so wonderful the way you expressed it. Especially the phrase combining the allowing the heart yet letting go of striving and judging” I have been in therapy & on a spiritual path for years, and finally know how beliefs/emotions work. And have been trying to heal/shift my value system, yet still working to release the quiet voice of guilt. So your words are helpful. Thank you!!
Nicola Walker says
Dear Spiritheart, Thank you so much for taking the tine to write down your appreciation of this article and how it has helped you in your life. I feel very touched by your words. I love hearing that one of my posts has helped to uplift and guide you to a deeper level of wisdom and awareness. Yes, you can feel the love expand your heart as you let go of whatever is causing you suffering. Once you let go you are free to be you in a much fuller, happier way. Ironically, once you let go of striving, you are much closer to your goal. You may find you’re already there. It just doesn’t look like you thought it did. Sending you blessings for a beautiful day. Nicola