Sometimes people have told me that they block their feelings and emotions. I can understand the temptation at times, when you don’t want to rock the boat. Emotions can be messy, with no respect for perfect timing. You don’t want to blubber during a meeting with a prospective client who says, “No,” and your mortgage is due. Or, shout at your boss when you need your job. Or even listen to those feelings that something doesn’t feel right about your relationship when you’re just about to fly off on vacation.
So it’s natural to want to push down inconvenient feelings and emotions back where they came from. At least you can control pretending things are fine.
This might work for a while. But it’s a little like pushing down a ball in water. The greater the force you use to push it down, the greater the splash when it finally surfaces. And if the ball is there, it will emerge at some point.
Have you ever had a bunch of roses that didn’t all bloom? Sometimes you get one bud that just holds its petals tight, hiding its beauty from your eyes.
Feelings and emotions make you bloom and grow. They lead you into a vulnerable place where the light can shine through. You face the unknown, but it’s real. It’s exciting actually. If you like watching adventures on TV or the movies, you might enjoy your own. “Oh my God, what’s going to happen next?!”
I do believe that living your full bloom takes a lot of courage, but that’s what life is about. I’ve been totally committed to mine, even though this has meant facing fears on a more regular basis than some people might. Courage is a muscle you develop, just like learning to listen, trust and follow your inner guidance is a muscle. Discipline, persistence and choosing to find your way back to inner happiness are all muscles too.
One of the ways your inner wisdom speaks to you is through your feelings and sensations. If you block your feelings then you block your inner wisdom, which is like your life force. Your inner wisdom helps you to elevate your life beyond the mundane. It leads you to discover more about yourself, your heart and life itself by stepping through pain, facing the unknown and discovering the light.
my fiance blocked his feelings for me, and then he left me, he said it is not something he choose but something that just happen, now he doesn’t even feel the brake up, we had a wonderful year together,of love, fun and happiness. now he says that even if we try again it wont work because he blocked all his feelings so its like he doesn’t love me…. how can that happen? we where making wedding plans an now it just ended. i try to be there for him but it is difficult as he doesn’t share the feelings i have.
what can i do? i need to get my fiance back this can’t be the end…. not like this
Hi Erika, I’m sorry to hear about your broken engagement. It’s very hard when you love someone and they no longer want to be in relationship with you. All I can say is if he is behaving like this, the chances are that he is not the right one for you. That means there is someone who would be a better match for you once you have healed from this loss and are ready to move on. I wish you all the love and happiness you desire. Often when you experience a loss like this, it is a good time to focus on building a loving relationship with yourself. The more you can glow with your own light and love, the more attractive you will be to quality men. Nicola